Restaurants in Malaysia (HOW WE EAT)
Malaysians are very different to many other people around the world...
We tend to be a bit...
MEH...
Here are some restaurant situations
(I actually observed and wrote notes on this so its actually accurate)
HOW TO ORDER FOOD IN MALAYSIA...
STEP 1:
Long food discussion - What you want?
STEP 2:
Father asks - How much?
STEP 3:
While ordering half way, waiter comes and asks - You want drink or not?
Father asks - Free or not?
Waiter says - Free flow!
We start ordering drinks...
STEP 4:
Family discussion - Set or Alacart cheaper?
STEP 5:
Decision made!!!
STEP 6:
WAITER!!! or... A MEI!!! or... XIAO JIE!!! or... AUNTIE!!! or... BOI!!! or... ORDER!!!
(you get the picture)
STEP 7:
Waiter tries to avoid you as much as possible and pretends not to see you...
After a few minutes, waiter comes -
Yes, can I take your order?
STEP 8:
Family takes order, but by then, decides to change what we're eating and we spend a LOOOOOONNNNGGGGGGGGGG time choosing - Waiter, what do you recommend ah?
STEP 9 :
While taking order, make specifications...
Mother - less sweet! (kurang manis!)
Father - give good meat! (choose piece got meat!)
Grandmother - the fish has to be fresh! (鱼要新鲜!)
Grandfather - Bring the food faster! ( food faster come ah!)
STEP 10:
Waiter repeats everything...
We say - OK...
(by this point, waiter sweating)
KIDS IN MALAYSIAN RESTAURANTS...
#1 - The innocent kid...
Playing with cutlery and toothpicks while parents order their food...
#2 - Bossy...
Kid - Ma, I don't want that! Can I have the other one?
Mother - No, 2 expensive
#3 - BOSSY...
Kid - MA!!! I DON'T WANT THAT!!!! SO DISGUSTING!!! I WILL VOMIT!!!
Mother - But darling, too expensive, your mommy cannot afford.
Kid - THEN I AM NOT EATING ANYTHING THE WHOLE DAY!!!
Mother - Fine, baby, I buy for you...
#4 - The really good kid...
Kid - Ma, you can order anything you want for me, even vegetables, I'll eat it all.
Mother - Okay darling! Good girl!
#5 - Copy Cat...
Kid - I want the fish with rice.
Brother - I want the chicken rice.
Kid - Wait! I want the chicken rice too!
Brother - Actually, I want the duck rice.
Kid - Wait! I want the duck rice too!
#6 - Chicken rice (me...)
Mother - You want the fish, the rice, the duck, the salad, the curry, the fried veg, the prawn or the sandwich?
Kid - Hmmmmmm...... I want the chicken rice!
Mother - Want me to say again? There is NO chicken rice! You want the fish, the rice, the.......
Kid - Chicken rice!
Mother - But...
Kid - Chicken rice!
Mother - But...
Kid - Chicken rice!
Mother - Fine, we go mamak...
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